/* This script and many more are available free online at
The JavaScript Source :: http://javascript.internet.com
Created by: John Hobbs :: http://www.velvetcache.org/ */

var quotes = new Array(319) // Add your quotes below
quotes[0]="Yes";
quotes[1]="No";
quotes[2]="Maybe";
quotes[3]="There is a strong chance";
quotes[4]="No way";
quotes[5]="Impossible";
quotes[6]="Your luck will soon change";
quotes[7]="Things will go your way";
quotes[8]="Not a chance";
quotes[8]="Possibly";
quotes[9]="Yes, but only if you start now";
quotes[10]="Never Give Up! - Never Surrender!";
quotes[11]="It could happen";
quotes[12]="Beam Me Up";
quotes[13]="Victory will be yours";
quotes[14]="Your karma will improve";
quotes[15]="It is your destiny";
quotes[16]="You will be beamed up now";
quotes[17]="Your question is so intelligent we have decided to beam you up now";
quotes[18]="It is not your destiny";
quotes[19]="It is your fate";
quotes[20]="It is not your fate";
quotes[21]="You question is so stupid you have been rejected for beam up";
quotes[22]="To achieve great karma you must boldly go where no man has gone before";
quotes[23]="It is not too late";
quotes[24]="You are entering a new dimension of time and space";
quotes[25]="Only in the Twilight Zone";
quotes[26]="I would have to make an X-File out a question like that";
quotes[27]="Only at The Outer Limits of reality";
quotes[28]="Your question is Non Sequitur";
quotes[29]="Only you can answer that question for yourself";
quotes[30]="Ask a stupid question - Get a stupid answer";
quotes[31]="That is a good question - Why do you ask it?";
quotes[32]="You already know the answer to that question";
quotes[33]="It is logical";
quotes[34]="It is not logical";
quotes[35]="Illogical";
quotes[36]="It is highly illogical";
quotes[37]="Vulcan logic indicates a positive response";
quotes[38]="Vulcan logic indicates a negative response";
quotes[39]="Vulcan logic indicates a neutral response";
quotes[40]="Vulcan logic indicates disaster";
quotes[41]="Vulcan logic indicates success";
quotes[42]="Vulcan logic indicates victory";
quotes[43]="Beam me up Scotty";
quotes[44]="Beam me up Scotty - There is no intelligent life down here";
quotes[45]="I can not answer that question without violating The Prime Directive";
quotes[46]="You must ask yourself that question";
quotes[47]="You will live long and prosper";
quotes[48]="Do not wander into The Neutral Zone";
quotes[49]="Only in your wildest dreams";
quotes[50]="It is within your reach";
quotes[51]="The answer is written on the wind";
quotes[52]="How many times are you going to ask the same question?";
quotes[53]="Do you really want to know the answer to a question like that?";
quotes[54]="The answer to that question would do you more harm than good";
quotes[55]="The chances are good";
quotes[56]="The chances are poor";
quotes[57]="The chances are slim";
quotes[58]="The chances are low";
quotes[59]="The chances are high";
quotes[60]="Mercury says yes";
quotes[61]="Mercury says no";
quotes[62]="Venus says yes";
quotes[63]="Venus says no";
quotes[64]="Mars says yes";
quotes[65]="Mars says no";
quotes[66]="Jupiter says yes";
quotes[67]="Jupiter says no";
quotes[68]="Saturn says yes";
quotes[69]="Saturn says no";
quotes[70]="Neptune says yes";
quotes[71]="Neptune says no";
quotes[72]="Uranus says yes";
quotes[73]="Uranus says no";
quotes[74]="Pluto says yes";
quotes[75]="Pluto says no";
quotes[76]="A candle lights others and consumes itself";
quotes[77]="It is not good to wake a sleeping lion";
quotes[78]="Even a broken clock is right twice a day";
quotes[79]="A man chases a woman until she catches him";
quotes[80]="He who builds to every mans advice will have a crooked house";
quotes[91]="The only thing worse than hearing the alarm clock in the morning is not hearing it";
quotes[92]="Ability is what will get you to the top if the boss has no daughter";
quotes[93]="Everyone excels at something at which another fails";
quotes[94]="The absent are always wrong";
quotes[95]="The best insurance against car accidents is a Sunday afternoon nap";
quotes[96]="After you have heard two eyewitness accounts of the same car accident you begin to worry about history";
quotes[97]="He who begins with too much accomplishes little";
quotes[98]="If you are worried about missing the boat remember the Titanic";
quotes[99]="There are no good ways to do evil things";
quotes[100]="An accountant is a person you hire to explain to you why you did not make the money you made";
quotes[101]="A budget is a mathematical confirmation of your suspicions";
quotes[102]="The difference between the past and the future is now";
quotes[103]="If you fail to plan then you have planned to fail";
quotes[104]="The candle that burns twice as bright burns half as long";
quotes[105]="From everybody elses point of view you are what you do";
quotes[106]="A man who enters a cave he knows has no other exit deserves to be trapped";
quotes[107]="Murphys Law: If anything can go wrong it will and at the worst possible moment";
quotes[108]="Do not dig a hole so deep that you cannot climb back out of it";
quotes[109]="You do not miss your water until your well runs dry";
quotes[110]="When spider webs unite they can tie up a lion";
quotes[111]="There is no such thing as great talent without great willpower";
quotes[112]="Actions speak louder than words";
quotes[113]="An actor is a guy who takes a girl in his arms looks tenderly into her eyes and tells her how great he is";
quotes[114]="Nobody can judge or punish you as hard or harshly as yourself";
quotes[115]="Adults are really not wiser than children they are just more cunning";
quotes[116]="You can build momentum by accumulating small successes";
quotes[117]="Adversity introduces a man to himself";
quotes[118]="A diamond cannot be polished without friction as the man cannot be perfected with out facing troubles";
quotes[119]="If wishes were fishes we would all cast nets";
quotes[120]="Anybody can give advice and even good advice the problem is getting somebody to take advice";
quotes[121]="When people ask for your advice they are usually looking for an accomplice";
quotes[122]="If a man asks for your advice he is probably not married";
quotes[123]="Medicine and advice are easy to prescribe but hard to take";
quotes[124]="The best time to give advice to your children is while they are still young enough to believe you know what you are talking about";
quotes[125]="Never give advice in a crowd";
quotes[126]="Never trust the advice of a man in difficulties";
quotes[127]="Advice when most needed is least heeded";
quotes[128]="Nothing is given so freely as advice";
quotes[129]="Old age is when you find yourself using one bend over to pick up two things";
quotes[130]="An allowance is what you pay your children to live with you";
quotes[131]="Better to be alone than in bad company";
quotes[132]="Sit with no man you would not be found dead with";
quotes[133]="An amateur is somebody who is always willing to give you the benefit of their inexperience";
quotes[134]="If you advise and counsel a man and he does not listen then let adversity teach him";
quotes[135]="Ambition is a great thing but it can get you into a lot of hard work";
quotes[136]="Never answer a question while you are angry";
quotes[137]="An angry man tends to stir up trouble";
quotes[138]="Anger has a way of punishing itself";
quotes[139]="Anger is a bad counsellor";
quotes[140]="Anger renders a man insane";
quotes[141]="The greatest remedy for anger is delay";
quotes[142]="No answer is also an answer";
quotes[143]="While you study revenge you tear your own wound open";
quotes[144]="An antique is an object that has made a round trip to the attic";
quotes[145]="One mans junk is another mans rare antique";
quotes[146]="The anvil fears no blows";
quotes[147]="One good thing about apathy is that you do not have to exert yourself to show that you are sincere about it";
quotes[148]="Never make a apology before you have been accused";
quotes[149]="All that glitters is not gold";
quotes[150]="The proof of the pudding is in the eating not in its looks";
quotes[151]="He who cheats his appetite avoids debt";
quotes[152]="A stomach that is seldom empty despises common food";
quotes[153]="The one thing bigger than my stomach is my appetite";
quotes[154]="Architecture is frozen music";
quotes[155]="When arguing with a stupid person make sure they are not doing the same thing";
quotes[156]="Never argue with a fool because people might not know the difference between you";
quotes[157]="You have not converted a man just because you have silenced him";
quotes[158]="There are two sides to every question";
quotes[159]="A long dispute means both parties are wrong";
quotes[160]="If you win all your arguments you end up with no friends";
quotes[161]="Art is poetry without words";
quotes[162]="Do not ask a blind man for directions";
quotes[163]="Every ass loves to hear himself bray";
quotes[164]="Every ass thinks himself worthy to stand with the kings horses";
quotes[165]="Growl all day and you will feel dog tired all night";
quotes[166]="No tears in the writer no tears in the reader";
quotes[167]="If you wish to see a mans true character give him power and see what he does with it";
quotes[168]="He who covets is always poor";
quotes[169]="Being average means you are as close to the top as your are to the bottom";
quotes[170]="A fence is the shortest distance between two gossips";
quotes[171]="A backache is mankinds greatest labor saving device";
quotes[172]="A bad reaper never gets a good sickle";
quotes[173]="Beauty and honesty seldom agree";
quotes[174]="Beauty without virtue is like a flower without perfume";
quotes[175]="Early to bed and early to rise is a sure sign that you are fed up with television";
quotes[176]="Honey is sweet but the bee stings";
quotes[177]="Everything is difficult at first";
quotes[178]="All glory comes from daring to begin";
quotes[179]="Everything must have a beginning";
quotes[180]="Good to begin well better to end well";
quotes[181]="He who begins many things finishes few";
quotes[182]="The first step is a good as half over";
quotes[183]="The beginning is half of the whole";
quotes[184]="Well begun is half done";
quotes[185]="Once begun the task is easy";
quotes[186]="What a man desires he easily believes";
quotes[187]="If you do not love the noise of the bells then why do you pull the ropes";
quotes[188]="An empty belly hears nobody";
quotes[189]="Better a bare foot than no foot at all";
quotes[190]="Do not be to hasty to outbid another";
quotes[191]="He must be pure who would blame another";
quotes[192]="There are none so blind as those who refuse to see";
quotes[193]="He that boast of his own knowledge proclaims his ignorance";
quotes[194]="Great boasters tend to be little doers";
quotes[195]="Believe a boaster as you would a liar";
quotes[196]="Do not judge a book by the cover";
quotes[197]="Book lovers never go to bed alone";
quotes[198]="A book is like a garden you can carry in your pocket";
quotes[199]="The borrower is the servant of the lender";
quotes[200]="Creditors have better memories the debtors";
quotes[201]="Borrowing is the mother of trouble";
quotes[202]="Do not draw your bow until your arrow is fixed";
quotes[203]="A brain is only as strong as its weakest think";
quotes[204]="A budget is a formula for determining that you need a raise";
quotes[205]="Every horse thinks that its own pack is the heaviest";
quotes[206]="None knows the weight of anothers burden";
quotes[207]="The best gift for the man who has everything is a burglar alarm";
quotes[208]="If a cluttered desk indicates a cluttered mind then what does an empty desk indicate";
quotes[209]="The man who minds his own business usually has a good one";
quotes[210]="There are none so busy as those who do nothing";
quotes[211]="There are more foolish buyers than foolish sellers";
quotes[212]="What cost nothing is worth nothing";
quotes[213]="Calamity is the test of integrity";
quotes[214]="Every cask smells of the wine it holds";
quotes[215]="Castles in the sky cost a great deal to keep up";
quotes[216]="Nobody tests the depth of a river with both feet";
quotes[217]="He who wants the rose must respect the thorn";
quotes[218]="Always hasten slowly";
quotes[219]="The chain is no stronger than its weakest link";
quotes[220]="Throw a lucky man into the sea and he will simply catch a fish";
quotes[221]="He who would be constant in happiness must often change";
quotes[222]="The more some things change the more they stay the same";
quotes[223]="Character is much easier kept than recovered";
quotes[224]="A man shows you his character by what he laughs at";
quotes[225]="Cheap things are not good and good things are not cheap";
quotes[226]="He that will cheat you at play will cheat you any other way too";
quotes[227]="Character is a habit long continued";
quotes[228]="The best way to cheer yourself up is to cheer up somebody else";
quotes[229]="Between two evils choose neither between two goods choose both";
quotes[230]="Common sense is not so common";
quotes[231]="He is known by his companions";
quotes[232]="When a dove flies with crows its feathers remain white but its heart grows black";
quotes[233]="If you walk with the lame you will learn to limp";
quotes[234]="If you sleep with dogs you will wake with fleas";
quotes[235]="If you cannot win the race then make the person ahead of you break the record";
quotes[236]="Integrity is easier to keep than regain";
quotes[237]="Compliments cost nothing but many pay dearly for them";
quotes[238]="Conceit is Gods gift to little men";
quotes[239]="Those who fall in love with themselves have no rivals";
quotes[240]="Be swift to hear be slow to speak";
quotes[241]="Money talks louder when your conscience is asleep";
quotes[242]="There is no pillow as soft as a clear conscience";
quotes[243]="A guilty conscience never thinks itself safe";
quotes[244]="He who is content can never be ruined";
quotes[245]="The less men think the more they talk";
quotes[246]="A mans conversation is the mirror of his thoughts";
quotes[247]="What costs little is little esteemed";
quotes[248]="Courage if often just ignorance of the facts";
quotes[249]="The test of courage is to bear defeat without losing heart";
quotes[250]="All men act bravely while the enemy is running away but not all men act bravely while the enemy is attacking";
quotes[251]="Courtesy costs nothing";
quotes[252]="To speak kindly does not hurt the tongue";
quotes[253]="To see what is right and not do it is the way of the coward";
quotes[254]="A coward makes threats only when he is safe";
quotes[255]="He who sells on credit has much business but little cash";
quotes[256]="The only way to avoid criticism is to do nothing say nothing and be nothing";
quotes[257]="A diamond is a chunk of coal that made good under pressure";
quotes[258]="Blessed are the deaf for they shall miss much idle gossip";
quotes[259]="A man in debt is caught in a net";
quotes[260]="The easiest person to deceive is yourself";
quotes[261]="A decision delayed until it is too late is not a decision it is an evasion";
quotes[262]="He who considers too much will perform too little";
quotes[263]="Your life is like a wheelbarrow it stands still until you push it";
quotes[264]="People often meet their destiny on the road they took to avoid it";
quotes[265]="Not every devil has a cloven hoof";
quotes[266]="Pity for us the devils boots do not creak when he walks";
quotes[267]="A smooth sea never made a skillful sailor";
quotes[268]="What is worth while is worth being difficult";
quotes[269]="A diplomat is a man who remembers a womans birthday but forgets her age";
quotes[270]="An ounce of discretion is worth a pound of wit";
quotes[271]="Silence is Golden - you will never be hurt by something you did not say";
quotes[272]="There is no disputing about taste";
quotes[273]="Distrust is poison to friendship";
quotes[274]="If you divide a jar of honey with a bear you will get the lesser share";
quotes[275]="A man who is his own doctor has a fool for a patient";
quotes[276]="A man who represents himself in court has a fool for a client";
quotes[277]="If you cannot bite do not show your teeth to your enemy";
quotes[278]="It is easier to know how to do it than to do it";
quotes[279]="Do two things at once and you do neither";
quotes[280]="Those who marry for money earn it the hard way";
quotes[281]="To make your dreams come true you have to stay awake";
quotes[282]="The finest clothes cannot hide the fool";
quotes[283]="A drunk mans joy is a sober mans sorrow";
quotes[284]="A drowning man will grab at the end of a sharp sword";
quotes[285]="Those who eavesdrop often hear more than they wanted to";
quotes[286]="You can only read just so many books during your life so choose them well";
quotes[287]="A self taught man usually has a bad teacher and a worse student";
quotes[288]="The best things to know are the hardest to learn";
quotes[289]="Just because the water is calm does not mean there are no crocodiles";
quotes[290]="A mans greatness can be measured by the greatness of his enemiesquotes[]=" ,
quotes[291]="The only real equality is in the cemetery";
quotes[292]="Everybody thinks they are the exception to the rule";
quotes[293]="Those who expect nothing are never disappointed";
quotes[294]="Experience is the best teacher because it gives you individual instruction";
quotes[295]="Experience allows you to recognize a mistake when you make it again";
quotes[296]="Experience is what you get while you are looking for something else";
quotes[297]="Sometimes a silent face can speak volumes";
quotes[298]="A fair weather friend is one who is always around when he needs you";
quotes[299]="He who leaves his own family has far to travel";
quotes[300]="Nobody is more helpless than a new born father";
quotes[301]="A fault once denied is twice committed";
quotes[302]="Most fools think they are only ignorant";
quotes[303]="A fool who keeps silent is counted among the wise";
quotes[304]="The talk of a fool is like a heavy pack on a long journey";
quotes[305]="The way of a fool is right in his own eyes";
quotes[306]="A fool and his money are soon parted";
quotes[307]="To reprove a fool is but labor lost";
quotes[308]="A fool says what he knows a wise man knows what he says";
quotes[309]="A fool can no more see his own folly than he can see his own ears";
quotes[310]="A learned fool is more foolish than an ignorant fool";
quotes[311]="Nothing is more humiliating than to see a fool succeed where you have failed";
quotes[312]="No matter how foolish the fool there is always a more foolish fool who admires him";
quotes[313]="He who overcomes by force overcomes but half his foe";
quotes[314]="If only our foresight were as good as our hindsight";
quotes[315]="It is sometimes expedient to forget what you think you know";
quotes[316]="Only the brave know how to forgive";
quotes[317]="The sweetest freedom is an honest heart";
quotes[318]="Those who lose their freedom have nothing else to lose";
quotes[319]="Your best friends are the ones who stab you in the front instead of the back";



function fortune(objID) {
  var rand_int = Math.floor(Math.random()*319); // Get a number for picking the quote
  document.getElementById(objID).innerHTML=(quotes[rand_int]); // Put the quote in the box
}